The night before I went to bed at 10.30 after having sat there, trying to make myself take a shower for two hours and failing. I slept well until 7.30 and then skipped morning pages because it was too late.
I did yoga, though. I have decided that this month if I have to choose between morning pages and yoga I’ll prioritize yoga. My husband and I ate breakfast together, I finally took that shower, I found that I had run out of clean bras and had to wear a sports bra, we talked a bit, he started a load of laundry and I called my mother on the phone.
It took a while to tell her everything that had happened that week. While my husband and I are very relieved that we have sorted the window situation and a big chunk of my health situation my mother is very concerned about us not painting the remaining wooden windows. Never mind that all of those windows are in a post where the weather almost doesn’t reach them. Or that we did look at them and are still convinced that the balcony needs painting more. Again. That thing is the bane of my existence.
We ate lunch, this time something quick and easy:
We talked about his frustration with me sitting at the kitchen table for hours and hours and doing very important focused work there. Which is understandable. I have been thinking about the reason I’m so attached to that spot and figured out that I’ve been sitting in this spot for years now, every since the boy was little and afraid of being alone when sleeping. So I started watching DVDs on my laptop and later playing ukulele and spinning in the evenings. I also started writing first thing in the morning there so that I would be within reach but not disturbing my husband.
And now I’m at a point where I associate the kitchen bench with writing. Or my bed.
My husband has been suggesting a new desk in the living room for ages but having a special place for writing felt like an obligation. What if I couldn’t make myself write there? One of the fastest ways to shut my creativity down is to tell her she has to come out right now because we made this special time and place for her. Like when my husband used to do my chores for me so that I could be free to write my dissertation. Always made me freeze.
But then I realized the new desk doesn’t need to be fancy. Just a small thing and a chair from somewhere around the house. And it could also be a place to leave the sewing machine out at times. Which would be very useful.
So after lunch and after reading a bit and playing some of those silly iPad games I took out a tape measure (from a knitting bag near the kitchen bench), measured the table I was sitting at and the part of the living room where there might be space for a desk, looked at the IKEA site and – ordered a desk.
It’s supposed to arrive on Thursday. Which might mean we hang up a cupboard next weekend, build a desk and find a new place for the dresser that holds my fabric. Which is very exciting!
After that I made plans for March and for next week and looked at all the things that I’d like to make happen, set some goals, read some more, ate dinner, started writing this post, hung up the second load of laundry that day because my husband had done a load of towels which doesn’t help with my lack of clean underwear, paid a deposit for the new studio windows, finally did the lunch and dinner dishes (Three frying pans! Three!!), did Duolingo, made a list for today, watched some C-drama and went to bed.
I have decided to prioritize sleep again this month. Let’s see how I’ll do!