creative.mother.thinking

I didn’t sleep well, woke up in a cold sweat around 3.20 and felt sick. I wasn’t sure if it was something I had eaten (too much fructose) or an infection.

I woke up from the alarm, lounged in bed for an hour and had breakfast. I didn’t feel good. And didn’t write.

My husband showed up and ate breakfast, we talked. I had sore muscles everywhere, all that running and walking the day before might have been just a little too much.

I did the dishes and then yoga. Yoga made things a little better. I ate a mid-morning snack because I didn’t feel well and then I helped making lunch. Goulash, orecchiette and salad:

For once I decided to take a nap. I think that was a good idea. I’m usually waking up rather early these days and then I’m all out of energy in the late afternoon. So I guess I’ll experiment with a 30 minute-nap after lunch for a bit. If I have the time. I’m sitting around for half an hour after lunch anyway, maybe napping will make the rest of the day a little better.

I still just hung around most of the afternoon but I did paint my toenails purple and refilled all the empty fountain pens – as one does. I also watched yet another free online course. I do like the teacher, she is rather sweet but I lost patience about ten minutes into her first video. The class is aimed at people who have never taken an online course before, and of course she had to explain everything in detail for people who had never met her before but it was a little slow for me.

The class is about altering patterns for tops so that they fit which I am rather interested in. She also invited a couple of experts, a woman who will be talking about body-positivity if I understood her correctly, a woman who is an expert on bra-fitting and a third one whose specialty I don’t remember.

I have the distinct feeling that I am not the right person for this class. Again. The ultimate goal of hers is to get people to sign up for her FBA (that’s Full Bust Alteration) class. I would love to take a class on that topic but then I remembered that I already have successfully made those alterations in the past. I just followed the instructions in one of my sewing books. Successfully. So I might be better off not paying the money for that class.

There is, of course, a closed facebook group for that class (the free one for now) and we are encouraged to get ourselves a learning buddy. Now. I know that the whole accountability partner thing is scientifically proven to help people. But. Actually I don’t think it has ever worked for me,

I was just talking to my husband the other day about workout buddies. Both of us have tried exercising with friends and have had arrangements where we agreed to meet the other person at certain times of the week to exercise together. Everybody will tell you how great that is, that you’re just so much more motivated when you know there is someone waiting for you.

Interestingly enough the friend that I went swimming with started to cancel about three weeks in. There was always some reason. And because she didn’t come I didn’t go swimming either. Until I decided that I wanted to get fit and that I liked swimming and that I would go Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays come what may.

I did have another friend who sometimes joined me on Saturdays and he was more reliable but in the end it was just me and me alone who moved her ass to the pool three times a week for two years.

And my husband tells a similar story. He had a running buddy. They started running together. The buddy wasn’t terribly fit. He wanted to change the route all the time, and he was way more interested in the conversation than the actual exercise. In the end my husband decoded that he would just go running, with or without the other guy and since then he has been running regularly on Monday, Wednesdays and Saturdays. Some time last year he added a Friday workout as well.

As I said, I know that science shows that being accountable to someone helps but I have to say in the end you either develop a sustainable habit or you don’t and ultimately you have to be able to do it on your own or it won’t happen.

The boy showed up around 5.30 because he was hungry and we watched the finale of „Star Trek: Next Generation“. I like it. The story is a bit crazy and the whole thing moves rather slowly but it is a nice goodbye to the series. I guess we’ll watch „Voyager“ in addition to „Deep Space Nine“ next.

Then I started writing this post, remembered that I had forgotten to prepare my bullet journal for the upcoming week, wrote for 25 minutes, let all the dishes pile up and went to bed.

Today there will be the usual Monday things, running (ouch), music, writing and probably not much more. I am in project-planning mode, I want to crochet another cowl, didn’t find yarn that I liked for that project (and could afford) on Saturday, thought I had enough fiber to spin for it and found that I haven’t. I might card some things together. Hm. Maybe I should mix some white or black in with the neon-turquoise and the flat blue. Yep. Sounds like a plan. I’ll divide the rest of the black BFL into two parts, card this into the ugly flat merino and should have enough for the cowl I have in mind. Huh. Problem solved. (And yes, I am fully aware that I am at a point where „I want to crochet this cowl“ turns into „I will card all this fiber and then I’ll spin it, neglect all the spinning projects in progress, ply it, wash it and then I will crochet the cowl. I might put it on the Louët Victoria instead of a spindle. Sounds like a plan. Now I just need an extra week somewhere.)

Apropos extra week, I also decided that I will do NaNoWriMo after all. Rather spontaneously on Saturday while walking the the yarn store. I am a little behind where I had wanted to be with the novel in progress. I’m at 22,000 words. The novel will probably be between 90,000 and 95,000 words when finished which means there are plenty of words to be written during November. So I think I will rebel and just continue the novel-in-progress.

I also am thinking of knitting a big sweater in lace-weight yarn for NaKniSweMo. First I need to liberate the yarn from the pi shawl I made, though. I won’t be wearing a huge circular shawl anyways, so I think I will rip that whole thing back, wash the yarn and make this cute cardigan out of it.

Planning and plotting. And I have re-inked pens to do it with. And yes, I am aware that I am making use of the collective NaNoWriMo and NaKniSweMo-energy out there for my own projects but I also learned in the past that if I rely on that to get my projects done I will only write for 30 days every year. Which is not enough.

I’d say that day was full enough for two. And went great.

I started the day by waking up at five again. After turning the lights off at eleven. Not ideal.

Did not write first thing but read and was excited about the day. Found out that the train I had planned on taking wasn’t running.

Had breakfast, meditated for five minutes and actually started writing. 25 minutes gave me 900 words which is not shabby at all. I saw my husband briefly and made him cranky by sending my phone number to Laura whom I was supposed to meet later that day.

Then I went out the door on my 8k run. Since I was short on time I managed a record time (for me). My bluetooth headphone battery died right in the middle and I didn’t even care.

It was slightly foggy still but became sunnier later in the day.

I’m still testing contact lenses and I like them.

Ran back home, took a shower, applied makeup and rushed off. With the old headphones because they don’t need charging. And with a phone that wasn’t fully charged which makes me nervous. But then it doesn’t take much to make me nervous.

I decided on wearing jeans, the striped t-shirt I made and my new Cria sweater because it was colder than I thought. I also was a bit afraid that Laura – the podcast listener/podcaster I was meeting – would be put off if I showed up in handmade purple things from head to toe. I knew that I needn’t have worried about that though when she send me a message saying, „I’m wearing a yellow t-shirt and a turquoise cardigan. (Plus a dark magenta scarf and a red coat. I knew I would like her when I saw that.)

Since the trains weren’t running properly I took one for about ten minutes (after walking for twenty) and then I took a tram and walked for 1.5 kilometers after that.

We had a great time at the wonderful Mercerie yarn shop. I almost bought some yarn, even, but was overwhelmed by all the wonderful shade that yarn came in, so of course I decided, „I can spin for that project instead.”

We stayed at the shop until it closed and I had tea and some cake instead of lunch. Then I asked her about her plans and she said, she had none but wanted to see some touristy stuff.

So we set out to walk all the way through Munich. From the West through the center out to the East. Along the way we encountered a lot of other tourists. When we decided that it was indeed time for real food we went to the Augustiner Keller which is about as touristy as it gets but we managed to find the part that was a little less crowded.

We had excellent beer and some Bavarian snacks. And we talked. And talked.

That might have been the first time ever that someone told me she likes it that she isn’t the one doing all the talking. I am rather used to people being mad at me for my incessant talking so that was a nice change.

When we had finished our meal we decided that it was time to head out again. Since the trains still weren’t running I had the crazy idea to walk to the East train station.

My train went a few minutes later. I was a little tired by then and only realized that I had arrived at my station after we pulled out again but that was not a problem. I just got off at the next one which is nearer to my home anyway. And I was thinking that they wouldn’t check tickets on a weekend where there is train chaos anyways. And I got lucky.

Went back home and my Fitbit showed me more than 28,ooo steps walked and more than four hours of exercise. Apparently I expended more than 2,800 calories.

The boy and I watched a very nice episode of „Deep Space Nine“ and tried the delicious champagne truffles I had received, I ate some cheese and had another beer.

Then I found that the podcast hadn’t finished uploading and so I re-started that for the third time.

I’ll get that out today, I promise.

Today there will be yoga and a little writing and not much else. I know myself well enough to know that there will be all slump all day.

Woke up at five. Which was a little too early.

Didn’t write and didn’t work on the podcast but I did read more of the „Atomic Habits“ book. That one is rather excellent.

Made breakfast and enjoyed a toasty kitchen. Yeah for functioning heating.

Since I had so many things to do I started by doing none of them, of course.

I talked with my husband, cleaned the house a little, took a shower and helped making pizza. Unfortunately, I was way too late with helping to cook which derailed lunch considerably and made my husband somewhat cross. The fact that the boy came home half an hour later than usual didn’t help. (He was talking to a friend. The friend’s mother had already started calling around, apparently. We weren’t worried yet because the two of them always come home late on Thursdays and Fridays.)

I did the dishes in a hurry and started panicking because I still hadn’t written a single word and hadn’t done anything on the podcast.

I taught my students. Since the last one canceled I used that time to get the audio podcast in order and write show notes. I had taken project pictures after before lunchtime so I could put them in as well.

Then the boy and I watched an episode of „Deep Space Nine“ and ate leftover pizza. He was in a rather talkative mood then. Which I do enjoy but I still wanted to get more stuff done. So we compromised.

I worked on the novel a bit and started putting the audio and video together. I’m hoping to get that done this morning but it isn’t looking good.

Today will be even more busy than yesterday. I want to write, run 8k and get ready to meet a podcast listener (and podcaster – I am really looking forward to this). And all of that before 11.30. Might get a little tight. I also am having a hard time to decide on a purse and outfit. Do I want to wear my new handmade cardigan or do I want to go for the all handmade, all purple outfit? Do I look like a crazy person in any of them? (I’m guessing yes.) Will I be totally miserable and too warm wearing the cardigan? Or will I shiver all day in the purple dress? Do I take a purse that can carry everything including a knitting project, a spinning project, my jacket, a shawl, cardigan and fingerless mittens plus eventual yarn that I need to buy because I’ll be visiting a yarn shop? Or do I go with the cute handmade purse that is lightweight and can be carried as a backpack but just barely holds the essentials and a sock-in-progress?

I know, this is ridiculous. Also, completely irrelevant.

Know thyself, they say. Bigger purse it is. When I’m feeling insecure I like to have all the things with me, even if that means my shoulder hurts all day from carrying them.

I’ll leave the ebook reader at home and just take my phone. Yep. Much lighter. (Remember the one hour train ride. There will be train chaos in Munich today again. There is construction on the main line that runs all the way through the city. That will be fun.)

I already got my ticket and looked up the connection and how to get to the yarn shop. Of course.

I’ll try and get the podcast out as soon as I can but if things go sideways it might be tomorrow. Sorry.

I did have a very good day after the *energy saving mode’-epiphany the day before.

I woke up really early and while I felt like I had slept well my Fitbit thought differently. I care more about how I feel, though. I did my usual reading and lounging in bed, and when the wifi turned itself on again I downloaded James Clear’s „Atomic Habits“ book. (I’m only 50 pages in but it is really, really good.)

And then I wrote for twenty minutes. Day 26 of 100 done:

Then I got up, made breakfast, talked with the boy a bit (who had a geography test and was planning on studying for it while in school – not something I’d recommend) and when he was gone I wrote some more. Yes!

Then my husband showed up, we talked, mostly about politics because he is still reading the newspaper I bought on Monday, and then we realized that the heating was actually broken.

We had been wondering about that for close to two weeks now. The radiator in the kitchen was cold in the mornings despite it being winter-cold outside. But sometimes one or the other of the radiators would be warm again. The furnace was obviously working because we always had hot water. There was no error message. We couldn’t figure it out. But yesterday my husband realized that the heating in the annex wasn’t working as well.

So he called the heating guy. We talked some more. All this talk about politics and similar stuff made me feel bad and I felt under-appreciated and like I never got to say anything. I felt bad enough to tell my husband and that, um, spiraled into a lengthy discussion.

Morning wasted. But we managed to talk about it in a way that we were good again by lunchtime.

Then I rode my bike to the post office to mail a letter. There are only two mailboxes left in the whole town. The one that used to be near our house has been torn down a few weeks ago. Then I went to get new handcreme for the boy. I was so fuzzy that I only found face cream and bought that.

Then I went on to the grocery store. Where I found that in my fuzziness I had forgotten to take the bike pannier. Which presented a slight problem.

I bought all the groceries. And managed to transport them using my backpack and the basket I have in front of my bike. But it was a close call.

I came back home and helped prepare lunch:

The boy was upstairs with his grandmother. And while it was sunny it was a little too cold to eat on the porch.

Then I took a short break, then I started talking with the boy (I couldn’t resist explaining what I’m doing for makeup when he asked me, even though I was a little late for recording the podcast already.)

I did my singing warmup and set-up for the podcast. Then I recorded the podcast, always eyeing the clock because my first student of the day is frequently early.

When I opened my door after recording the podcast (fifteen minutes before the student was due) the heating guy and my husband were crouching in the hallway, looking at the annex heating.

Heating guy changed a valve for the annex, something we had been talking about for ages, and diagnosed the general problem as a broken sensor that was supposed to measure the water temperature in the boiler. Since it was showing a temperature much lower than what it was supposed to be it kept prioritizing heating the water in the boiler over moving water around in the pipes.

Fortunately, he had a sensor in his van and so our heating should be working again.

Which means that I won’t be as cold. Probably. So maybe not my thyroid.

Today will be another full and busy day.

There will be cleaning and pizza-making and the getting the podcast ready for publishing and writing and maybe music as well. I’d also like to watch Star Trek with the boy tonight. Oh, and there will be students.

Fun!