Not massive stress, mind you, but still enough that I couldn’t sleep.
Because on top of the usual November/December panic with all the presents for Christmas and birthdays, and the planning of a birthday party for our son, and the re-scheduling of students that we usually have this time of year it also turned out that our dear son had stopped studying for Latin about a year ago, and now that came back to bite him.
His grades are bad enough in Latin and German that he will fail the grade if he doesn’t change anything up. And then it turned out that he doesn’t really know how to study. Or to make sure he actually knows the stuff he has been looking at afterwards.
Which means that I now have the additional duty of making him learn Latin words (and grammar but that will be a little later), and then sitting down with him every night to test him.
While this is a nice mother/son bonding experience in a strange way I also resent this very much. I have to work harder and longer because he couldn’t be bothered. On the other hand it is pretty clear that he is lost on his own, and that’s what one does for one’s child, one helps when needed. Still.
On the other hand I am very happy to have found out what the thing was that made me wake up around five in the morning. And I do feel a bit better now that I can actually do something about it.
I also went out and got myself some valerian and St. John’s wort to help me sleep better.
I don’t usually say that I’m stressed. Usually my life is pretty busy, and things can become hectic, or too much but they aren’t really stressful very often. Also I meditate every day again which does help a little to hold the stress at bay.
But right now things are rather stressful. Though I am working on making them a little less so. I have lists, and I try to do things in a timely manner, and not let lose ends hang.
I have all the Christmas presents and birthday presents already ordered, and yesterday I went out and bought wrapping paper and such. Which means I will wrap presents over the next days, and then I can exhale again because that has been taken care of.
I find that getting all the presents on time doesn’t really help. As long as there’s still the wrapping to do, or the sending packages to family I still feel as if those tasks are draining my energy. And since I will have to wrap them eventually, and since wrapping them on Christmas Eve didn’t really help me feel better, I have decided to do it right now, and then have it over with.
I have slept a little better the past few days. I’m still not really in a calm and peaceful place but then that’s probably to much to ask this time of year.
I have to say that I’m really looking forward to the holidays when we’ll have two weeks off. They will probably be filled with family visits and their own kind of panic but still.
So how do you feel these days? Stressed out? Loving the calmness of this time of year?