daily journal

Meh.

Of course the reason I went to bed past midnight was that I had an extra long teaching day. Or maybe it was the fact that I was too tired to get ready for bed. Or that I started compiling data about my writing in the evening. Or that I still played Genshin after that. Or that I then decided to research C-dramas I want to watch in the future (never mind all the C-dramas I started watching at some point that I still want to finish, eventually. Or that I didn’t brush my teeth early enough.

We’ll never know. Every day it’s a new reason for the exact same thing.

On the bright side I did my complete morning routine including twenty minutes of manuscript time, morning pages and yoga before breakfast. Our conversation over breakfast was a bit strained because my husband is so stressed out. One of the main reasons is the computer setup both in the basement for drum lessons and in his studio for everything else.

So I had a change of plans and started looking at the new computer we bought for downstairs. I had set it up at one point about a year ago or so, but it needed a software update and I wanted to test some things.

It will definitely work but I will give my husband one of my computer mice. The one we use right now has a USB-A dongle and I don’t feel like getting an adapter for that.

So I spent all morning listening to my husband complaining, waiting for the different computers to load, update and back up with sprinkles of dishes and making the grocery list.

The supermarket run was quite the production. There was a spot of rain but not all that much, I managed to hit the exact time that the school on my way lets students out (twice), and had to walk around the whole store three times or so because they are rearranging things yet again.

I didn’t feel all that bad about not finding polenta when the store employee I asked didn’t know as well, told me she was looking for something similar and just pointed vaguely in the direction of rice or baking ingredients. Sure.

When I arrrived home both my mother-in-law and my son entered the garden gate at the same time. My husband hastily left the kitchen and declared he’d eat alone in the annex because he needed some quiet, and so I could just unload the groceries while the boy was talking to me about group theory (something with algebra, don’t ask me) and then I read  while eating, interspersed with short exchanges with my son.

I was very happy that lunch was already ready on the table:

Afterwards I only had a little time for reading and playing my video game (time that I mostly spent looking for certain flowers in vain, very frustrating) before I needed to hang the laundry up that I had started in the morning and get ready for teaching.

The laundry was very wet and heavy, I seem to have overloaded the machine and so it didn’t spin properly. Well, it will get dry eventually. Most of the time when that happens I’ll move the laundry around and start the spin cycle again but I didn’t have time for that.

I saw another potential new student and it looks like I have two new students now, starting next week. I got the dreaded, „couldn’t we start the lesson a little later?“ again, and no, sorry, the rest of that day is solidly booked until my dinnertime.

Speaking of which, my third and fifth student didn’t show up. With the first of those I’m not sure if I remembered something wrong or if she forgot, no idea. I had her in the calendar but then I made a repeating calendar event. The second one texted me, super sorry, she had to work late.

I was able to reschedule her for today which pleases me no end. I like working with her. Which reminds me that I need a new song for her to sing.

So I used my first surprise break to write my author newsletter. I had done a first draft the day befire and put it together  which took almost an hour. Only after did I realized I could make blocks of text, images or links and save them so that I could pull them for each newsletter. That would make writing them much faster.

I debated making music or writing new words during my second surprise break but in the end I just took a break. And ate the bag of chips and the chocolate I bought at the supermarket. Yes, I know what I wrote about the day before but getting one salty snack and one extra sweet treat per month is part of my challenge. I decided to make it my Mother’s Day treat. Well, advance Mother’s Day treat, wahtever.

The day still wasn’t over at that point, so I started writing this post before meeting with my writer friend for an hour of writing. After which I played some more Genshin Impact and went to bed with a book.

My husband has already vacuumed the old part of the house, so there is less to do today. I’m plannign more laundry, some vacuuming, setting the new computer up, and teaching all the students. Oh, and bodyweight training because it’s Friday.

Time for the weekend.

But yeah, busy.

I went to bed on time, yeah! Well, five minutes late because I spent five minutes doing foot and knee exercises, I’d say that’s alright.

I did the complete morning routine including twenty minutes of writing and was even pretty early. Husband and I had breakfast, then a bit more talking while knitting (about people and Buddhism, among other things) and then I made my online rounds before cutting my husband’s hair. Then the dishes and then I wasn’t quite sure if I should write some more, or not. So that meant I scrolled through Instagram, of course.

It was time to walk/run at that point. The promised rain hadn’t shown up but the skies were looking darker and cloudier. I decided to risk getting wet and went running in just a t-shirt and shorts:

When I came back home my husband’s bike with the trailer was standing in front of the garage which was weird. He had carted empty bottles to recycling but was nowhere to be seen. I ended up putting his bike away after talking to him, he had been in such a rush that he decided to just park it outside.

There was also a card in the mailbox about a package that had been delivered to one of our neighbors because none of us was at home. It’s a pretty rare occurrence, and I know and like the neighbor, so I went over and retrieved the package.

I hung the load of laundry up that my husband had started in the morning, took a shower and then it was time for lunch:

It doesn’t look much but it was very good.

I played some Genshin and then it was time for work. Lots of nice students, a short break in between where I didn’t really do anything but read, and then I was very happy to finally eat dinner. The boy had just returned from uni and told me about his day, and then I fell into a spreadsheet rabbit hole.

I’m reading this book about writing that is all about spreadsheets and wordcount and production schedules and that made me look into the data I have for my own writing. I already knew how much I can write in an hour but I did not know that I only spent an average of 9 minutes per day on writing this year. That is not enough, I’d say because at that pace writing takes ages.

At that pace it would take me 600 days to write a book. On the other hand, that data is from the beginning of this year when I was also busy getting two books ready for publishing and putting them out, so I’d say the numbers are skewed.

Anyway, time to get a bit more serious about writing again.

After pulling myself out of confusing data I started writing this post, did the dishes, wrote a list, brushed my teeth and played some more video game. I want to level a character and for that I need to gather materials.

Today there will be grocery shopping, some writing, not quite as many students but I’ll see another potential new one, and in the evening I’ll meet a friend online for another writing session.

I went to bed the traditional 45 minutes too late again. This time it was mostly the boy’s fault but now all his new clothes are sorted.

I was, again, very determined to make good use of my morning and, again, didn’t really. I dawdled, I read newsletters, I wrote morning pages, I opened my computer and – read more stuff online.

Sorry for all the whining, I’m getting pretty cranky and angry at myself.

There was yoga and my 5-minutes meditation and then breakfast with my husband. We talked a bit longer because he had gotten a letter about his retirement and we had to look stuff up and will have to make a decision about when he should start drawing his pension. He will have to keep working at least for a while because the pension is not really enough to live on.

That did take a little longer than usual but that was okay. I did the dishes and then set out to another epic errand run. Dropping the clothes return off, tea shop, the supermarket for yogurt and the health food store. Planning the route was a bit puzzling because there was no way to avoid looping back. I decided on tea first, then yogurt, then health food store because that one is closest to our house and would give me the most stuff to carry.

I set out in rather warm and sunny weather that had me sweating in just a t-shirt. My husband has been very concerned about the rain that was forecast but so far there was only very little the night before. Tomorrow will likely be much wetter.

Just before entering the supermarket I realized I had forgotten my list at home. That happens way too often. Maybe I should get into the habit of taking a picture of it at one point in the day but, of course, the best habit would be to take the list with me.

I texted the boy and asked him to send me a picture of the list. There was a faint chance he’d be awake and see it in time.

I bought yogurt and cheese, then walked back towards the health food store. When I hadn’t gotten a reply to my message at the point where I had to decide whether to go back home or brave the store without a list, trying to remember everything on it, I decided to walk back home and risk the extra ten minutes of walking.

I offloaded tea and yogurt and went back outside.

I was very tempted to blow the „(almost) no sugar“-challenge. I mean, just one measly chocolate bar? A few salted nuts?

But then I remembered that this was only the second week of the challenge and how much better I’m feeling without it.

When I came back this time, lunch was ready and my husband had even set the table out on the porch. We’re setting a new record of eating outside this year already:

That meal came about because we still had a bottle of dark beer in the house and didn’t want to throw it away. Also, both of us shared the rest of the bottle but there wasn’t much left.

I only had a short break that I spent reading and talking with the boy while attempting to play my video game. Badly.

Then I taught all the students, including a potential new one (very nice) but excluding the one that skips lessons rather often. This time I only waited for six minutes and then started playing the piano. I figured I’d hear the doorbell if she rang.

After teaching I cleaned all the mirrors and got ready for bodyweight training. Then I waited for the boy while reading, we troubleshot his new sneakers (they have weird laces and lacing), and then we finally started training.

I was very hungry by the time I ate dinner. Afterwards I started writing this post while the boy was making himself fried potatoes and veggie nuggets for dinner, I wrote my list, washed my face and did the exercises for my feet and knees (the list of exercises I need to do every day is getting longer and longer), opened the manuscript for a short time, played some more Genshin Impact and went to bed.

I really need to get back to writing earlier in the day because when I do I feel so much better.

I went to bed 45 minutes late and felt it all day. Slow start to the day, so no writing, Morning pages, yoga, short meditation and breakfast with my husband. We had a very nice conversation while I knitted.

I finished a sock:

And then started the next one right away.

I did the dishes and got ready to venture outside for my walk/run:

I came back home and took a shower right away. The idea was to leave time for writing between lunch and teaching but instead it just stressed my husband who would have needed help making salad.

We ate outside again which was nice but very loud. The construction next door has reached the landscaping stage which means there are big diggers and such makings noise next door constantly. After lunch I took a short break, talked with the boy, and before I knew it it was time for teaching.

I taught most of my usual students but one had canceled so I used that time to call a potential new student. For ukulele which is always nice.

My last student was my friend whom I gave a piano lesson over Zoom and then we talked for a while.

Then it was time for a quick dinner before I met the boy for our weekly meeting to fight the bosses that are too hard for me on my own. As per usual I made all the dumb mistakes and managed to let both of my characters die at one point. The good news is that you can still get the rewards regardless.

We tackled the mountain of dishes and pots from lunch together, then the boy finally tried all the new clothes and shoes that we had ordered, and then I was late for bed again.

I’m hoping for a bit more free time today. Teaching starts half an hour earlier but I’ll be done about 90 minutes earlier as well, so that looks pretty good.

Or so.

I went to bed at midnight, both because there were still things I wanted to do and because I was dreading the day because of that conflict with my husband.

I woke up at 6.30 before my alarm but was pretty slow at first. When I was right in the middle of my morning pages my husband showed up and – surprise – was all in a good mood, conflict basically over. Phew. We’re good again which is much better.

I skipped writing again but did yoga and meditated and then we had breakfast. There was brief talk of having breakfast outside but since my husband already started eating while I was doing yoga we decided to stay inside.

There was nice conversation, I called my mother and we talked, and then I helped my husband making salad for lunch. Right after the day where we had set a new rule that I am not allowed in the kitchen before lunch is ready. Well.

This time we did eat outside:

This is the view from our back porch into the yard:

After we went back inside my husband started doing the dishes right away and I helped. I’m finding that it’s easier to do the dishes after having eaten outside because I am not sitting on the kitchen bench, moving back inside involves a natural transition and that can lead to just starting the dishes easier.

Of course it’s much easier still when someone else starts them.

I read quite a bit, then played Genshin Impact until a timer reminded me that I had planned to write in the afternoon. I had a bad case of the dunnwannas paired with „I have a thing at 5 so I can’t do anything else before“, and read some more.

An article about bullet journal led me to thinking about how many of those I already have and I pulled the first one out that I could find on the shelves. It is from 2017 and while there are quite a few things I’m still doing the same way I also changed lots of things. Back then I did not review nearly as much, it’s mostly just lists of what I want to do.

There are also a lot of notes about books I’m reading. Nine years ago I made my way through a ton of writing books. 

And then it was time for my 5 o’clock Zoom. I was meeting with an online friend who had helped me think through stuff a few months ago and I felt like I should return the favor. We had a fun conversation where I barely knit which is rare.

I then browsed the internet until five minutes before the boy and I had scheduled bodyweight training. I went outside to see what my husband was up to and found him on a bench at the back of the garden taking a break. I sat next to him which I never do and we got to observe a hedgehog shuffling through as if we weren’t there.

Then I was somewhat late for bodyweight training and we suffered through the dreaded 10 sets of 3. It’s all one-minute intervals which means you never quite get going for real and you keep interrupting yourself all the time. Weird.

It was time for dinner afterwards, then I brushed my teeth, wrote the list for today and then started this post interrupted by both my husband and the boy but only briefly.

I played a little more, then finally started plying the purple Corriedale and went to bed.

I did all my usual Saturday stuff but I haven’t cleaned anything this week. Which I’m not happy about. My new cleaning regimen of doing a little bit every day is not working at all. I guess I’ll have to make it a bigger priority or something.

Most of my energy yesterday was spent on talking with my husband about the kind of things that keep bugging you about your partner and will never get better, no matter how hard the two of you try. Fun times.

Other than that I did my walk/run (even if I chose an easier version with short running intervals because my legs still hurt):

The weather was gorgeous and the woods and fields were filled with lots and lots of bike riders. The ones that come from behind on their e-bikes at high speed are particularly bothersome, especially when you’re wearing headphones and listening to music. I dropped a return package off on my way (before the exercise, not after) and was back home with enough time to take a shower before lunch:

My husband used the leftover asparagus to make risotto.

We talked some more and I used my anger to do the dishes right away. Then I continued reading „All of Us Murderers“, ate some chocolate and played Genshin Impact.

The plan was to use the hour before my weekly writer Zoom to actually write. Before that I wanted to talk briefly with my husband because I don’t like to be angry.

Well, that conversation made me even angrier and took more time than anticipated so there was no writing.

Writer Zoom was just me and the writer who hosts the meeting, everybody else just didn’t show up. I told her that I was out of sorts because I had a fight with my husband but then we continued having a very nice and helpful conversation about writing and what we did that week, knitting and playing the fiddle.

While talking I managed to botch my sock in progress, I tried fixing my mistake but made it worse instead (the mistake was several rounds down, I did a 2/1 cable instead of a 2/2 and I soon lost patience with the whole process and just ripped back the offending rounds completely.

After that the knitting went really well and I am loving the magic chart I set up in KnitCompanion, you can set up charts in that app in a way that means you can see the row you’r working on really well and it moves your marker forward by a row with a single tap. It’s brilliant.

After that Zoom call I ate dinner, opened the manuscript for 45 minutes and got many new words that look pretty good right now, talked with my husband again repeatedly and with the boy a little who was getting ready to leave for that party, I played more Genshin and achieved a new milestone but only at the price of playing right up to my bedtime, I started this post, made a list in my bullet journal, brushed my teeth and such and went to bed late.

My list for today is pretty long. There will also be more uncomfortable conversations for sure. Ack.

But apart from that I have been having a great week.

Oh, and I finally listened to Richard Strauss „Metamorphosen“, the one piece I didn’t manage on the April list. At least I am all done with last month and can look at the May pieces now. Debussy, Tavener whom I don’t really know, and a Mozart piano trio. I’m looking forward to doing the dishes to that today.