creative.mother.thinking

I woke up around six I think, feels like it was a week ago or so. Got up, decided to skip meditation and journaling because it was so late. I set the two clocks by hand that didn’t change on their on and had breakfast. My husband showed up with a great need to talk so we talked. I spun a little, for about five minutes and then I switched to knitting because it’s less hectic for the people near me.

Oh, and I found out that apparently the pictures I post don’t appear in the RSS feed. I don’t normally look at my own posts in a feed reader, I only take note if they show or not but happened to click on a post or two over the past few days and found that none of the nice pictures that I put in showed. Pity. There were a lot in the Saturday post, for example. No idea why that is happening and how to fix it but I thought I’d let you know.

My husband built a fire and had breakfast and then the boy. He keeps showing up on time or the 9.15 meeting. Hurray! He did school work again but I think he actually finished everything because by mid-afternoon he was no longer working in the living room. Hurray again!

I had big plans to clean the bathrooms and do yoga but instead I talked with my husband and then with the boy, prepared the podcast and knitted. I did help to make lunch but only a little:

There had been leftover ground beed from the day before (already cooked, of course). More dishes after lunch and some chocolate and then I cut out the pieces for a face mask. I’m using this pattern (in German). I used a sleeve each from two old t-shirts that I’m no longer wearing and gathered all the tools. And then I ordered some new blades for my rotary cutter because I never changed the blade ever.

After that I went to the annex and started setting up for the podcast. I tried a new setup and had to do a few tests until the whole thing ended up looking like this from my side:

It’s not ideal, I don’t like the reflections on the piano behind me and I would have preferred to mount the tablet and the ring light on the same stand but it turned out that it’s not possible to fit the tablet in there with the mounts I own. Printing the list of things I wanted to talk about out in big letters turned out to be an excellent idea as well as using the music stand to hold it. Since I’m sitting further back than before and am putting the mic on a stand I had more room to fit the music stand in.

Since I recorded the English episode the whole thing took about two hours or so and I ended up late for my virtual knitting meeting. By then I was not really in a talking mood, sorry to my friend.

At 6.30 the boy and I watched some Voyager while eating dinner. The episode („The Voyager Conspiracy“) was somewhat boring and slow. I think the boy might have fallen asleep. So we decided to watch an episode of „Star Trek: The Animated Series“ as well („More Troubles, More Tribbles“). That one was fun, especially once I realized that the Klingon captain Koloth was the same that we had met on Deep Space Nine before. Of course, tribbles are always fun.

And then I watched some more of the documentary „Alive and Kicking“ about Lindy Hop.

Which meant I was somewhat late already when my husband wanted to talk some more.

I started writing this post and debated writing some fiction. And then I didn’t but instead spent a few minutes attending a virtual birthday party for one of my online friends on Zoom while spinning. Way beyond my bedtime. Again. But hey, party.

I did not do yoga, the bathrooms remained uncleaned and I didn’t really feel all that recharged after the weekend but that’s alright.

Today there will be running in the cold and gray (less people, I hope, than Saturday), some podcast editing and such and teaching five students online. And early to bed. I hope.

I’m also really hoping that we’ll settle down a bit in the upcoming week.

I slept in again, until 6.28. This time it was deliberate, I turned my alarm off, turned to the other side and went back to sleep. Did get out of bed right away after being awake, so that went well but then I had this wave of ennui about meditating and writing morning pages.

I did eat breakfast pretty early and got around to writing some more fiction. Hurray!

Then I remembered that I had forgotten to specify which lecture and workshop I wanted as a reward for the „Year of the Cat“-Kickstarter hitting its stretch goals so I did that. I really love it that Dean Wesley Smith answers each email himself. I think I got part of someone else’s reply, though, because he was writing about things that had nothing to do with my email. Which just comes to show that the best of us get a little fuzzy at the moment. As always he was rather nice and pointed out to me that the workshop I chose won’t make much sense for me because it builds on one I haven’t taken yet but I decided to take that chance. Worst case I’ll take the other one once I have money tp spend again, best case is that I will get quite a bit out of the one I chose anyway.

Never mind that I am accumulating online writing workshops at an alarming rate while not actually working on them at the moment. Same as with unread books, maybe.

Since I didn’t spin at all the day before I decided to be good and do my fifteen minutes in the morning:

I guess that is my final post for Georg’s spinning challenge. I thought it would go on til today but I was wrong. At least I spun for fifteen minutes six times this week, not too bad.

The boy came down on time and we did our morning meeting. There wasn’t much to talk about but I still like that we are checking in with each other. Of course, in the evening it became clear that yesterday would have been the perfect day for me to help my husband repair the greenhouse but we both forgot.

There were dishes and helping the boy phrase an email to a teacher because he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. Then my walk/run:

All the pictures were taken at halfway point. I did 8.11 kilometers at a pace of 8’22 per kilometer with five minutes warm-up and cool-down each and intervals of 2’30 of running and walking. I felt pretty good.

What you can’t see in these pictures is that it was totally crowded out there. With the lockdown there are a lot more people out in the woods and the fields than usual. Especially on a sunny and warm day like this. I totally expect those numbers to drop next week when we’re expecting cold and gray weather again. Keeping the appropriate distance was a little challenging at times.

When I came back home my mother had sent me a text and so I decide to call her right away instead of waiting for another day. Like my mother-in-law she harped on about how we should get money from the government to cover our losses. Which meant I had to explain for the third or fourth time this week that we haven’t really had any major losses yet. I can’t really tell the government that I want reimbursement for the two students who wanted to start lessons with me and can’t start right now, or for the two students who don’t want video lessons and decided to not come in for the next two weeks.That is within our normal student fluctuation.

Also, with a healthy emergency fond and no overhead to speak of we are doing quite well, all things considered.

I did help a little with making the chili my husband has been craving all week:

I couldn’t get dried beans so these are from a can but it was delicious as always. We all like the dried ones better and they are less heavy to carry as well.

After lunch I had big plans for preparing the podcast and such but fell down the rabbit hole of learning more about online teaching and found myself watching videos on Youtube for an hour or two:

I almost ordered a thingy to connect my USB microphone to my iPad but then thought better of it. There is no need to spend a lot of money right now. The setup I have does work and is easy to use so I’ll stick to that for the time being.

So I didn’t prepare the podcast episode. And didn’t do much else.

The boy and I started watching our movie of the day early. He had chosen quite a few movies he wanted to watch with me and so it was my time to watch „The Martian“ for the first time ever. I’d say not a bad movie at all but – of course – not as good as the book. Which is my usual verdict.I read the book years ago and really loved it but had forgotten quite a few details. It wasn’t as earth-shattering for me as for the boy but then I have been reading science fiction since 1982 or so. For him it must have been one of the first books in that genre ever.

After watching that movie my husband really wanted to talk and I folded the laundry while we did. We also had a longer conversation about our new way of teaching earlier.

Then I started writing this post while having a second beer, started preparing the podcast and went to bed. Since I finished „Blood and Ash“ by Deborah Wilde I started the second in the series that morning and was hooked again.

Today there will be yoga and finishing prep for the next podcast episode, recording the episode (I hope) and maybe a virtual knitting meeting with Eliandhra. Also, some ‚Star Trek:Voyager‘ in the evening. Only one beer and an early bedtime, I hope.

I slept until 6.18. No idea if my alarm went off or not, I didn’t sense anything. I use my Fitbit as an alarm and it vibrates. Usually that is enough to wake me up. I also use the smart alarm setting which wakes you within a certain window of time according to your sleep patterns. For the past few days I didn’t get anything.

I got up right away again which resulted in me not scanning the news first thing and in managing to meditate and write morning pages. There was not enough time for fiction writing yet again. And yes, I am perfectly aware that this is a story I tell myself and that I did lots of other things all day. Some of them I could have skipped in favor or writing. I did continue reading and knitting, at least:

All of us are still rather tense but I get the feeling that we’re starting to settle in with the new patterns. I even got most of the weekly cleaning done while my husband was out running. I still need to clean the washbasins and toilets later today.

I picked up takeout for the first time in ages. I’m actually worried about the local restaurants. We debated getting our food delivered to minimize contact but in the end decided against it. I wore a face mask and gloves for the first time and it did feel a little weird. I used the mask that I keep with my dyeing supplies. Everybody at the restaurant was very mindful of keeping the appropriate distance and there was cling film put up as a barrier between the staff and the guests.

The food was delicious:

Apparently I was very hungry. Not only did I forget to take a picture of my spring rolls before eating the first one, I also completely forgot to take a picture of the main course. Fried noodles with chicken for me, fried duck with Thai sauce for my husband and some vegetarian sushi for the boy. Getting the takeout also reminded us why we stopped doing this on a regular basis. First, it is somewhat expensive and second, everything comes wrapped in plastic and the curry and noodles you get in styrofoam containers that are partly melted from the hot food. We used to prefer eating at the restaurant instead. Not right now, though.

I did the dishes, struggled to prepare the lessons for the afternoon (and failed) and then started a long afternoon of video chat after video chat. Had to restart often. But most student had adequate equipment and internet connection. I am so grateful for the chance to continue teaching, even if the conditions are not perfect. It’s also interesting how much I value the social connections to my students. I tend to think of myself as a fierce introvert but I was rather happy and relieved to see all the familiar faces.

Singing lessons remain the most challenging of all. Both for me and the students. But we are still making music. And nobody really played music all week. Real life was rather distracting. I did start teaching all of my students the „Wings of a Dove“ song and it felt like they really appreciated it. It’s also interesting how much less I am singing and playing the piano right now because I can’t make music together with my students. When I taught that song using call and response I felt myself for the first time in weeks because I really got to sing again.

Yesterday marked the day I came full circle on a week of teaching online, it was all first times on FaceTime and Skype until the last student of the week. She was the one that started the batch of online lessons a week ago.

My husband and I are still working out the kinks. And one of the new things is that we get a lot more homework. Usually, our method of teaching means that we often decide on the spot. Start a new song, search for something, my husband often will sit down right there and transcribe something the student wants to learn but all of that is not possible over the internet. So every teaching day requires more prep work and after each day I am left with a list of things I need to do. Emails to send, links to share, it’s quite a bit of work.

Still, we both very much agree that it is a great blessing to continue working under the circumstances.

After teaching I met with the boy. For the second day in a row he was working on his German essay. And every time I met him he had a question, was unsure about how to say something. He had to analyze an Eichendorff poem and kept asking me for my opinion. Seems I have gotten better at this sort of thing since I last had to do it for school. The funny thing was when he started the whole essay with what he deemed unnecessary florid sentences and over the top artsiness and both my husband and I had to tell him that that was what the average German teacher would consider just right. Probably. My kind of writing never passed muster in school either. I was pretty delighted at some figures of speech that were essentially the boy and found that he has indeed inherited a rather dry sense of humor. No idea where he might have gotten that.

Still, he could be persuaded to leave essay writing for dinner and watching the last episode of the first season of ‚Star Trek:Picard‘. We both found it rather enjoyable. The end was not unexpected but very satisfying and we had a nice discussion about the general premise of the episode. (We don’t really agree, by the way, but the whole premise is highly hypothetical, so no way to be sure.)

Then there was more essay-writing which meant that I was sitting there, scrolling through Instagram while answering the boy’s questions until I finally got myself to start writing this post. Until he followed me into the kitchen for more questions about his text.

Turns out I can write a 1,000 word blog post in the time it takes the boy to write the last three paragraphs of a 1,000 word essay.

Somehow I went to bed a little late. Wonder why.

Today there will be running and cleaning the bathrooms and preparing the podcast. Bonus points if I actually manage to record the episode and record another one tomorrow to publish next Friday but I wouldn’t hold my breath. Recording singing warm-ups for my students would also be fantastic but I don’t see that happening.

And in the evening we are having plans to watch „The Martian“. And eat chocolate truffles. Priorities. So important.

I actually slept in until 6.50 or so. Which also tells you that I’m usually cheating a bit by writing my daily post the night before. If anything turns out wildly different than I thought it would I change it in the morning but not if I oversleep. I am starting to feel rested, though. Since I always procrastinate like crazy in the mornings and spend too much time on the internet first thing I got up as soon as I was awake for a change. Got dressed, read „The Daily Stoic“, meditated and wrote morning pages.

It was too late to writ fiction but that was way better than the days before. I made breakfast and ate it. My husband showed up early because he couldn’t sleep. We’re all still out of sorts. There was a lot of talking.

The boy’s big project for the day was a German essay. I’m sure he could have done that in a slightly more focused way. As it was he still wasn’t finished by dinnertime.

I went upstairs to ask my mother-in-law about what groceries she needed. That turned into a long talk where I tried to keep an appropriate distance. Then I went to the supermarket by bike. We had run out of more things than I would have thought. I could barely fit it all on the bike. I realized that that is one of the reasons why I am still going to the store every week. I don’t really have a way to carry that much food. Also, the shelves are mostly empty even though that is starting to change. Still no yeast in any form. And no dried beans.

I was pretty late for lunch, so I ate quickly:

And then I hurried to prepare the day’s lessons. I did my very first singing lessons. Playing together was out of the question but I still managed to teach slightly modified lessons. And we also did some things I had never taught before. So while these online lessons are in some way lesser than the usual ones I do find that we are all more focused and working harder on the music. Which is good.

I had planned to do strength training afterwards but was hit with an attack of the dunnwannas again. So I started writing this post, ate some chocolate instead, spun a bit, read some more of „Blood and Ash“ by Deborah Wilde (highly recommended, I am halfway through right now). The boy came to talk with me while I was still in my studio and told me that my husband had helped him with his essay, even.

Then I watched a video on how to make sleeves fit while spinning a bit:

And then I procrastinated about the dishes and de-calcifying the kettle for an hour or two. I finally got around to doing everything way to late and went to bed after eleven. That’s always fun.

Since today is Friday there will be all the teaching all afternoon and all the cleaning all morning with hopefully a break in between and some time to prepare the afternoon’s teaching.

And in the evening a new episode of ‚Picard‘. I’m really looking forward to that.

I did get enough sleep, at least. Woke up early and spent the first hour or so online again. I really should change that. Yes, I know I said that yesterday. And the day before.

I did meditate for five minutes, so that was good.

Nerves were frayed in the house, there might have been words. I went to the local tea shop to pick up my order. We’re set for another two weeks or so. I wanted more of my favorite breakfast tea but they were out. The owner of the tea shop looked rather frazzled. I got to help her by putting a sign on the door when I went out that only one person was allowed in the shop at a time. It is a very small shop.

People outside were generally very friendly, smiling and greeting each other. We had a line in front of the tea shop spaced 2 meters apart and I talked to the woman in front of me.

I went back home and did my walk/run:

There were quite a few people out, all keeping their distance from each other. I was happy about this sign of spring:

By then I was already feeling better but for most of the morning I felt so exhausted that I wasn’t sure if I would fall asleep on the spot or burst into tears first. The answer turned out to be ‚burst into tears‘, by the way. Briefly. All of us were feeling the strain.

After my run I still felt like melting into the floor but at least my mood was better. When I came back home my husband was busy cooking. We talked back and forth and he made a joke that had all three of us laughing for minutes. (That’s rather nice, by the way, that the boy is spending most of his day working in the living room. It means we spend more time together. This was lunch:

After lunch I wrote more emails to students, finally took a shower, did the dishes (yes, in that order) and started teaching over Skype. The first student had a problem with his guitar but I was able to actually show him how to use a screwdriver to tighten up the screws in the machine head. (Look! I learned a new word. Didn’t know how to say that in English before.)

I only taught three students because two hadn’t answered my emails. I tried calling both of them and finally got hold of one who has been a student of mine and my husband for many years. 12 or so. Turned out that his cell phone broke right as the shops closed so he couldn’t get a new one and he never checks email on his desktop computer.

My husband had a pretty long day, teaching from 2 to 6 with barely a break, each lesson the first one with that particular student over Skype or FaceTime.

Then there was bread and cheese for dinner, 15 minutes of spinning and the start of this post and then bed.

Today there will be grocery shopping for us and my mother-in-law, my very first singing lessons over the internet and if I have some energy left after that I’m planning to do strength training.

I woke up super-early and spent the first two hours of the day or so online checking the news. This is not recommended. So no writing, no meditation, no morning pages and then I forgot my thyroid pill which meant a late breakfast.

The boy came downstairs for the daily meeting almost on time again. There really wasn’t anything to discuss but if there had been we would have been ready.I read and I knitted and there was a lot of talking.

I also went out to the health food store and because I didn’t get what we needed I went to the butcher and the bakery and a nearby supermarket as well. There were very few people around, everybody kept the distance and some shelves were still rather empty. There is still no yeast to be had in any form. Or canned tomatoes and such.

My mother-in-law was feeling better already, well enough to go to her scheduled eye appointment. 

Then I helped to make lunch. Mostly leftovers but also chicken. And papadums:

Then I took a little break, did the dishes and started teaching through my iPad.Things went well, I taught all my regular students. There are of course major drawbacks to this but it’s the only way to have music lessons while keeping the right distance and therefore I love it. We are still figuring out what is possible. And today both my husband and I had to learn how to share documents with the students (and vice versa).

It is rather exciting but also pretty draining.

I had lofty plans of doing strength training afterwards but instead I ate some bread and cheese for dinner and watched a webinar about moving live events to livestreams by Patreon. It was aimed at musicians and so those ‚tools and tricks‘ they were talking about were pretty relevant for me. Even though I probably won’t do live events on my Patreon. But then maybe I should.

By the end of the webinar I felt myself nodding off so I just started writing this blog post, brushed my teeth and went to bed. I moved the journaling to this morning.

Today there will be running and pickup at the tea shop and then more teaching. I might teach my first ever singing lesson online. I didn’t have the time to record backing tracks or warm-up exercises but the whole thing doesn’t have to be perfect right away. I see more research heading my way later today. And this will be a very long day.