Sorry. I guess.
When I stopped my daily blogging at the end of November I thought I’d start again at the end of December or so. I did stop because of my lack of energy and I thought (rightfully so) that I should take time off from everything I could. And I did. For three weeks over Christmas and New Year I basically did nothing.
What I did was the bare minimum of moving, lots of crochet (finished a blanket), practice Chinese a bit and watch all the Netflix I could. Up to the point where I was wondering if I should just cancel Netflix. I think I’ve reigned it in enough that that won’t be necessary but still.
I’m still not sleeping enough because I am staying up too late watching TV and then I can’t sleep in in the mornings. I’m still eating too much. And I am again teaching just a bit more than I am comfortable with. By Thursday afternoon I am usually at a point where I should just cancel all students for the rest of the week but of course I don’t. I still am as nice and fun and patient and helpful as I possibly can be and then I collapse into a heap and just resume watching silly Chinese romantic comedies.
I was a bit reminded of the time that I watched sitcoms obsessively in the nineties up to the point where I just kept on watching stuff just to get it over with. I have now decided to not continue watching shows I don’t thoroughly enjoy and am actually rewatching so that I can have the enjoyment without the compulsion.
I also have an ever-growing waiting list with potential new students and it’s driving me crazy but I am strong and I’m not calling them. I’m just letting it got until we’re out of lockdown again. And I don’t really want more students. I have several days per week where my brain is usually mush after work and I feel as if I need a whole day off to recuperate. So I really shouldn’t take on more.
All of that means that the writing hasn’t made any progress and there still are a lot of things that need to get done. Not this week, though, and probably not next week either.
The boy turned 18 in December and we celebrated with Chinese takeout and cake and gave him a bottle of whiskey and a pretty nice laptop/tablet.
We celebrated Christmas with food and only very few presents and had the special Silesian Christmas bratwurst with my mother-in-law in her living room, with 1.5 meters between her and us and the windows open a lot of the time. And we only met for 45 minutes. We celebrated New Year’s Eve with watching TV and going upstairs to my mother-in-law’s living room for half an hour, standing around socially distanced with the windows open not quite as often because by then none of us had left the house for ten days apart from going for runs and brief forays to get groceries.
Actually, the boy didn’t leave the house for a month at all until he finally went outside for a walk all by himself. School is all distance-learning with him sitting in front of his computer all day long and working hard to do all his homework and re-writing a paper he will submit on Sunday to „Jugend forscht“ (German science fair-thing). My husband and I sit in front of screens all day teaching.
I went to my first ever remote birthday party and it was really nice. I met new people that I hadn’t seen before in my life for the first time in months. We celebrated my husband’s birthday with cake, Chinese takeout and the most expensive wine I could get in the health food store.
I started another crochet blanket that I don’t need but the colors are making me happy.
I am hoping to get back to writing and to making music and that some day I will actually finish the dress that’s lying around without buttonholes, buttons and a hem but not this week, I guess.
So, I might be back to daily blogging. I hope. Because I missed this.
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